Monday, July 6, 2009

It's amazing to me how our own pain can be put into perspective if we stop thinking about ourselves all the time and look around.
Mom recently has had two friends with tragic news related to their sons. One lost her son, an experienced diver, in a deep sea diving accident after a freak malfunction of his equipment. The other's son was diagnosed with a glioblastoma multiforme, a very serious type of brain tumor which usually carries a poor prognosis, even with the most aggressive treatment.
Finally, I heard a story that has preoccupied me since I learned of it. A story about us, basically, but not exactly. A story so like ours that I know I have a role to play. We learned of a couple in Nashville, friends of a friend, who lost a baby girl after 4 days of life. For 24 hours, she started her life perfectly healthy and then the news came, and 3 days later she was gone.
I relived our 4 days with Elise. I felt it all over again. Of course it hurt...but not as much as it used to...and the more powerful emotion was of the hope that, through my pain, I could maybe help someone else's pain, just a little. That I might just give a little wisdom or a little comfort or something. It's not like taking solace in another's pain but like knowing what the experience might bring. Maybe it's not about me anymore, maybe it's time to wake up to this amazing, ugly, colorful, screw-up, broken world and come at it, not with a hammer, but with ears to listen.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Bless you, Stephanie, for all of the wisdom and beauty and courage you bring to the world every day!

You are such a wonderful person, and I count myself so lucky to have you as a friend. ...Soon, I imagine that the anguished parents in Nashville will feel blessed to have you in their lives, too.

Love you!

Rosie

Shey said...

My heart breaks for that family in Nashville...they are blessed to have you be aware of them. Elise's life has made this world a better place.

scarrie said...

Wow, though you feel that you have been going over the same ground for a while now, to another's perspective, you have taken control of your journey and are making more out of it than many have the capacity to do.

I miss you guys and I'm thinking of you.

-Carrie

Amanda said...

Stephanie,

Just wanted you to know that I still think of you and Elise often. The first year is just so difficult. I don't know that it has really been any easier since Gavin's anniversary this past spring, just different. May God continue to surround you with the love and support of family and friends. Thank you as always for sharing.

Blessings,
Amanda

Forever missing Gavin 4/7-5/3/08